In the name of our Creator the most Gracious, the most Merciful, the All-Knowing,
In October 2020 I was honoured to do a speech at my brothers wedding. My preparation included a reflection of a verse in the Quran on marriage.
Surah 30, verse 21:
“And among His Signs is that He has created mates for you from among yourselves that you may find peace in them and He has set between you love and mercy. Surely there are Signs in this for those who reflect.”
Once again we are being invited by our Creator to reflect. He emphasises at both the start and the end of the verse the reference to “signs” upon which he notes that those who truly and sincerely reflect on Quranic verses they will identify with these signs.
Why give us signs to reflect on?
One of the core purposes of the Quran is that the Almighty invites humanity to challenge and question things by using our intellect, to ponder, to reflect, to think and not be led in this life blindly. The first verse revealed was Iqra, “READ”…Throughout the Quran, he presents verses in such a way he challenges us to reflect upon them. To dig deep into the essence of what he is communicating.
Reflect upon what? Why should we reflect on these signs?
- Could it be to understand who he is? Is it to understand his greatness, his attributes?
- Is it to understand who we are, how we came into existence?
- How the universe and everything around us came into existence?
- Is it meant to help us understand our purpose of existence?
Is it meant to help us navigate our way through this life in truth and with purpose and direction without being influenced by society and our own limited understanding of this world? Is it meant to free our minds and liberate us towards the truth?
Are these signs hence not his guidance on the areas we should seek knowledge on, areas you should investigate and in so deriving conclusive evidence of truth, devoid of any influences, of a Supreme being, a Creator far greater than we can comprehend, displayed in everything around us – the harmony and wisdom in all of nature, the endless expanding universe; our own complex and sophisticated make up, our ability to see, hear, touch, smell and feel all types of emotions and feelings.
If so, lets reflect upon this particular verse;
The two key signs the Almighty highlights in this simple yet profound verse is:
- Allah has created both individuals from amongst oursevelves for the purpose of finding tranquility in each other;
- Allah himself has placed the love and mercy between both individuals. The source of this love is hence directly from him.
As I continued to reflect, I realised just how deep and broad this verse can translate. The first sign talks to the Creation of the two individuals. In this we can reflect endlessly, as this emphasises his Greatness. He is the Creator of everything but if we reflect on just the creation of humanity this is endless in its greatness. He then goes on to explicitly expand on their purpose as mates, indicating that he has Created them as mates so that each will find peace/tranquility within each other. Basically the one would be the source of tranquility for the other. Effectively your home should be your go to place for tranquility/peace, serenity, stability and compassion.
Ultimately this is the purpose, a straight path, a path to the water (shariah), one of the many paths to attain peace / tranquility in this life.
The second sign, Allah notes that it is He that places the “love and mercy” between them. Us as a creation, we can investigate, to build towards an understanding in the physical sense but what is our understanding of love and mercy, being intangible, and how does our understanding tie into this particular sign that love and mercy is placed between mates directly by the Almighty? I researched the definition of love, there is no one particular definition. I found multiple views on what love is e.g. whether it is a feeling, an emotion or a behaviour.
I redirected my research back to the source of this love and mercy coming from the Almighty. Both love and mercy are of his attributes i.e. 2 of his 99 attributes, Al-Wadud (The affectionate, the most loving) and Ar-Rahman (The most Merciful). Refer separate blog on a breakdown of Al-Wadud http://www.simplifaye.co.za/2020/07/24/essence-of-love/
In summary, this type of love and mercy embodies purity and sincerity of heart, deep affection, compassion and empathy which is expressed through behaviour in actions. The key is not only in holding these feelings in your heart, the true essence of this love and mercy is reflected in your behaviour and actions.
It is the ability to feel what the other is feeling, it is not about wanting to be right all the time, its about wanting to be a good person, the focus is inward on the sincerity of your own heart, on your journey to become the best version of yourself.
You can hence connect this love and mercy as being the source to attain this tranquility in marriage.
My final questions:
1. How does one consistently recharge, maintain or sustain this love and mercy to ultimately retain the tranquility / peace throughout our lives? To align to our ultimate purpose to worship only our Creator?
Surely this would require the consistent remembrance, consciousness, and connection to the very source of this love and mercy, being our Creator?
2. If so, how will you remain connected and conscious to this supreme source to maintain this love and mercy ?
- Can you remain connected and conscious by getting to know yourself and focussing on purifying your own heart?
- Can you remain connected and conscious by understanding who the Almighty is through his Creations through attaining knowledge and ultimately truth of all things around you physically, spiritually and emotionally?
- Can you remain connected and conscious through your consistant five daily prayers?
- Can you remain connected and conscious through annual sacrifice of fasting from dawn to dusk?
- Can you remain connected and conscious through continuous rememberance in giving and kindness, focussing beyond yourself, on the less fortunate?
- Can you remain connected and conscious if given the opportunity to perform pilgramage as an ultimate journey towards universal consciousness?
Refer below a few blogs linking to the above pattern of thoughts:
http://www.simplifaye.co.za/2020/08/24/know-yourself/
http://www.simplifaye.co.za/2020/08/25/purpose/
http://www.simplifaye.co.za/2020/07/29/balance-and-purpose/
http://www.simplifaye.co.za/2020/07/22/to-know-yourself/
FJ💗
