In the name of our Creator, the most Gracious, the most Merciful

“When Moses came to the place appointed by Us, and his Lord addressed him, He said: “O my Lord! show (Thyself) to me, that I may look upon thee.” Allah said: “By no means canst thou see Me (direct); But look upon the mount; if it abide in its place, then shalt thou see Me.” When his Lord manifested His glory on the Mount, He made it as dust. And Moses fell down in a swoon. When he recovered his senses he said: “Glory be to Thee! to Thee I turn in repentance, and I am the first to believe. verse 7:143”

As I reflect on this verse where Moses (Peace be upon him “Pbuh”) asks God to make himself visible for him to see him,  I began reflecting on my experience on Arafat / Mount Rahma. I recalled someone saying that this experience reminds them of Moses Pbuh, in particular, his amazing gift of direct, two way engagement with God.

Extracts from my Hajj journal 

Shanaaz and I agreed to skip lunch and start making our way from the tent area towards Jabal Al-Rahma (Mountain of Mercy), the area where we chose to execute our “Arafat strategy” the distinct, specified engagement with our Creator. The period of Wuquf (meaning standing) has commenced. It lasts from about noon to just before sunrise the following day or some interprets it to be period up to sunset  on the same day. A period of complete focus and connection and engagement with your Creator.

We grabbed a lemon drink from the freezer box outside which at this point was quite hot. We attempted to apply a piece of ice to help cool the walk to the mountain. We commenced our walk with umbrella’s and backpacks filled with our prayer mats and journals. The heat was intense and the air dry. As we drew closer towards the mountain, we were confronted by millions of people. We weren’t sure we would be able to get to the top. We however, found a side section, a hill running alongside the mountain. There were not many people around this area.

We managed to climb the back of this hill. As we climbed higher, we were graced with a beautiful cool breeze. When we got to the top, we were both taken back by the sight of the millions of people on top and all around this mountain all either in silent prayer or collectively engaging God Almighty, sitting or standing, hands open, eyes open or closed… you could feel your lips engaging with “Labbaik Allahhumma labbaik… – O my lord, here I am at Your service, here I am”. The energy was unbelievable. This surreal image of what appeared as a beautiful, flowing white sheet, gracefully coating the mountain and surrounding areas, immediately brought tears to our eyes. I laid my prayer mat onto a flat rock for us to sit on. Immediately this felt right. We were present and conscious. I felt connected to something beyond comprehension. Peace and contentment filled our hearts solidified by our choice to move from the tents. It felt as if that spot was exactly where we needed to be by design.

As we sat and opened our journals, the unexpected happened.

In our silence, we were welcomed by long gentle drops of rain which patted onto our books. I opened my hands, the rainwater gently touched my hands and slowly cooled me down. We immediately got up, looking at each other and up towards the sky in disbelief. My thoughts, is this really happening? Within moments from extreme heat to this? Rain was not experienced in this way in over 40 years according to feedback.

As I gazed up at the sky, the rain intensified. So much feelings and thoughts running through my mind. Was my prayer being answered? The night before I asked for a tangible experience, a physical, emotional and spiritual experience…

White fluffy clouds formed in layers giving the effect of the sky lowering. In the moments this happened, I felt this unbelievable closeness and deep connection. As I gazed up, I saw beams of remaining light brightly shining through the clouds as if shining directly on you.

As the rain intensely and continuously poured, you could feel the energy and vibration of the millions praising God “Allahu akbar – God is most great” across the mountain. The millions of voices were aligning and becoming louder as the lightening responded, followed by intense thunder, reciprocated by this collective energy vibrating across the mountain…The echoes of “Allahu akbar – God is most great”. This engagement continued for a few minutes, it was as if a direct dialogue between Allah SWT and all those present, in that moment it felt as if he is responding “I see you; I hear you; I forgive you…” The connection was indescribable, it was a connection in the form of a deep conscious experience, via a connected human energy of unbelievable power. A physical, spiritual and emotional closeness like I have never experienced.

I was soaking wet but did not want to miss this opportunity of an authentic moment of direct engagement with my Creator. In a suspended moment, as the rain was pouring, present and conscious, I looked up into the sky and started pouring my heart out.  My tears started flowing as my hands raised. Amazingly everything I planned to engage and reflect on came through in but a few moments by thought and memory. I didn’t have my journal in front of me, however it felt as if this was merely an extension of the physical expression of everything I have already written down and reflected on leading up to this moment. It was as if this moment was the closure, the clarity and the removal of any doubt… My entire “being” felt connected and aligned and my heart was at peace. In that moment, I felt lighter through the process of letting go, a sense of empowerment, a sense of freedom, a sense of comfort, a sense of confidence, a sense of humility, a sense of trust and security through the clarity of a Creator far greater than I could ever comprehend.

“Alhamdulillah – Praise be to God”.

It was narrated that our beloved Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, said, “The Hajj is Arafat…”

A thought I found in an article that stuck with me. “The obligation of Hajj is great in its rituals, sublime in its characteristics, noble in its fruits, magnificent in its benefits and wonderful in its effects. It has uncountable benefits and interests. Rather, Hajj includes the noblest objectives, the greatest wisdom and extraordinary benefits.

Allah The Almighty Has Pointed out such benefits and objectives in simple words, Saying (means): And proclaim to the people the Hajj [pilgrimage]; they will come to you on foot and (mounted) on every kind of camel; lean on account of journeys through deep and distant mountain highways; that they may witness benefits for themselves. [Quran 22:27-28]

In my last moments on Arafat, after returning to the tents from the mountain, drenched from the rain, stillness in my heart, I did my final reflections. I heard someone say, the helicopter hovering above, flashes a green light throughout wuquf, and a red light when the period of wuquf is complete at sunset. I looked up to the sky and observed the helicopter circling and signalling a red light.  I observed the sky, I gazed with tears flowing from my eyes, gratefulness in my heart, a sense of peace and comfort. A warm, content moment. The skies were opening as if signifying the end of Arafat. Since this moment, I have never looked at the skies the same. I knew that this experience will forever be etched in my memory, in my being, in my heart and deep in my soul…

FJ💗